Shhh, listen. World is changing. With fast speed!
And what I know from what I see is that People in the world have gone crazy. And to me (lately), it seems so rare to find someone who thinks with any kind of common sense anymore. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to change them? People? Maybe, no?! But how? The really hard part (to understand especially) is that it starts with changing 'yourself'. Yes. No doubt. Period!
I do, really resonate with the following,
“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” - Leo Tolstoy
And if something I can do is to change myself and work on myself. Daily. Without an exception. I trust me, I do have some work to do, I should be following my mission and I have to get connected to myself again. Perhaps I am, even more than I have ever been. I am listening. Carefully observing the World around. You have to become aware!
And how you should practise all this? Let me explain.
1. Always be grateful
By saying a simple 'thank you'. It’s nice to feel appreciated and you aren’t the only one to think so.
Acknowledging the good side of people will bring a smile to their face too :) And in turn they might see good in you. Sometimes the change in attitude is visible on the face of the other person. This change doesn’t get more direct. It’s a shame that gratitude is so rare that it catches people off guard. Also, even being grateful in general, grateful to be able to wake up on a new day, grateful for a roof over your head, simply being here - present, and so forth just makes others want to be around you. I know (for fact), that goodness is contagious.
2. Open yourself to the listening of the world around you
We live in a time of an amazing phenomenon where we have the instant ability to learn anything we want and connect to others, but we feel the most isolated. Why, how come? And trust me, this also is possible even among friends and family. During conversations, we are so focused on what we are going to say in response, so we don’t sound dumb, that we aren’t really listening and trying to understand the other person. When we focus more on listening to understand rather than listening to respond, we form an actual connection. People are more likely to return the favor and actually listen to you because you get it. Don't you think?
3. Serve - to yourself, and to the others around
Let’s take gratitude a step farther by 'giving' to others. Give them something to be grateful for. Give them a reason to smile. Give them hope.
Life is hard.
Life is cruel.
Life is tough.
However, that doesn’t mean you have to be. And sometimes the smallest things can change a person. Not just one! My advice - be the change if you want to see the change in others. It's the only way to go if you wish to grow as a person and fulfil your freedom. Freedom from tough and cruel life. Step by step! Keep walking.
4. Reach out whenever needed
With so many people feeling disconnected, you can easily get lost in a crowd. Like, when you go to a party, what is the first thing you do? Let me tell you - you find that 'cool person', the charismatic one. Those are the ones that always have a crowd around them. Right? Why?
It’s understandable why we gravitate to people like this. Because we want to have a crowd around us, too. We have a message that needs to be heard, we need validation. Contrary to the initial reaction, we should actually be focusing on those around the edges, standing alone. These people also have stories to tell, ideas and messages to be heard. Yes, think about it. The world is not just spinning around you. Go and find 'them'. Start your own crowd. After a while, others will start to gravitate to you, when they realise they can be active participants in a conversation, rather than listening outside the circle. Give people an outlet and a chance to participate. After all, you are, and so I am one of the 'cool people', too - just like these soloists.
What better way to initiate change in others than by giving them a chance? Give change, always. The moment is never right but so it is!!
5. Forgive, once and for always
If something, I know, this one can be hard (as hell) and takes a lot of time (talking years and years), I get it. Been there, done that. Just hear me out. Just because you forgive them, doesn’t mean you give them the chance to do it again. Right? You are your own powerful tool, you are in charge of your own mind, remember that! However, it also doesn’t mean you have to squash them like a bug. Forgiveness looks different from person to person, but we do live in a world that doesn’t have enough of this. This world needs more 'forgiveness'. And yes,
- it is still possible to disagree with someone and still see good in them.
- it is possible to trust people with one thing but not another.
Like, you may be able to trust their work ethic and know they will get a project done, but also know they have sticky fingers and shouldn’t have access to finances. You may not even agree with political views and have some heated arguments, but know that they are incredibly loyal as friends. Ok?! Know the difference. Observe, again. Listen. Be present of the 'movements' around.
Know where to limit and where to keep. If you only kept perfect people around you, how many people would be there? Would you be there? Pause and think about it.
When you change the way you look at people, continuing to trust them where they have strengths, they will have to look at what changed and why. Even if things don’t improve with the individual in question, others see your response. Others can see how to treat people and will know you and your boundaries. Trust me when I say - forgiveness earns a degree of respect from other people'. Who wouldn’t want more of that? I do for sure.
6. Be in charge
Want to influence and change other people? Start doing something. Find a project to work on, a goal to achieve. Being a 'self starter' is inspiring to so many people who just go through the motions of day to day life. But if you want to change people, show them that change is possible. It’s so easy to get stuck in the rut of day to day living (comfort zone is a killer!!) it’s hard to change a routine. Start a project. Ask for their help. And remember, when you serve - they serve. Giving them an opportunity to give can change them just as much as when they get help.
Get them out of their routine. Get out of your comfort zone, inspire and be inspired! That's how the current world operates. Nothing less, nothing more.
Once again, changing others requires changing yourself first.
If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at your life and make a change.
Make a change (the change will not come itself).
And remember, when we change ourselves, it makes others take notice. They change with us or fade from view. The best way to surround yourself with the best people is to become your best self. Your best self, yes.
Until next time, S.
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