1. Let's break down the word intimacy first
Intimacy is closeness between people in personal relationships and It is what builds over time as you connect with someone, grow to care about each other, and feel more and more comfortable during your time together. Intimacy can therefore include physical or emotional closeness, or even a mix of both. You have probably heard of intimacy as being related to sex and romance, but that is not the case. Intimacy is not another word for sex (do not get confused with the word ;)). Let's explain some more, so it's going to be clear enough. First thing to remember is, that It is possible to have sex without intimacy as well as intimacy without sex (got that? :)).
2. Intimacy plays a role in other types of relationships too
For example, throwing a party or gathering a small group of friends together as opposed to a huge crowd with many strangers. Also you might be referring to the quality of the time you spent together. Or perhaps just a small talk with your close friend, opening up about some personal details and/or bonded over common interests. Elements of intimacy can also be found in your relationship with the family, friends and other trusted individuals.
'Intimacy means different things to different people and our specific ideas of intimacy may be influenced by our interests, communication and various ways to get to know someone.'
3. There are different types of intimacy
- Physical intimacy (It is about touch and closeness between bodies. In a romantic relationship, it might include holding hands, cuddling, kissing, and sex).
- Emotional intimacy (Allows you to tell your loved ones personal things that you might not necessarily share with strangers).
- Intelectual intimacy (Involves getting to know how another person’s mind works and sharing the map to your mind too. It builds as you exchange ideas and have meaningful conversations).
- Intimacy of trust (In order to share personal parts of yourself — like your most embarrassing secrets or your deepest fears — you have to be able to trust them).
- Intimacy of acceptance (When the other person accepts you for who you truly are).
- Intimacy of honesty (You often can’t have one without the other).
- Intimacy of safety (When sharing your deepest, truest self with another person. This sure can put you in a pretty vulnerable position).
- Spiritual intimacy (Generally speaking, spirituality is about belief in something beyond the physical realm of existence. It means different things to different people, so spiritual intimacy can vary too).
- Experiential intimacy (When you build experiential intimacy by spending quality time with someone and growing closer over common interests and activities).
- Intimacy of compassion (Compassion is a natural component of caring about one another’s well-being).
- Intimacy of affection (It is all about showing that you care).
- Intimacy of communication (good communication is the key to a healthy relationship).
4. Intimacy must be build
Intimacy is more like a quality that you continue to cultivate over time. Trust me, you will not just wake up one morning and say 'Yeeey we are intimate now'. Simply does not work like that! The more time you spend sharing experiences and feelings, the more elements you have to work with to build intimacy.
5. Intimacy does not always come easy
Sometimes we might feel fear when building intimacy - that's quite normal. However If anyone has ever violated the trust, it can take a while to want to take a chance with them again (Hurts too trust me, but you overcome it by the time passes).
6. Once you find it, it sure does benefit your health
Well, intimacy comes with some health benefits that you simply can’t get any other way. It also helps your mental health, reducing your stress level as your feel-good hormones get a boost from touch like hugs and emotional release like laughter. In fact, intimacy can actually boost your immune system too, lower your blood pressure, and reduce your risk for heart disease.
It’s a key building block for a happy, healthy, and fulfilling life. Let's get intimate and take care for each other. And be kind kind to all living species around you. Show the world that you care!
Until next time, S.
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