Self-love, which is also often referred to as 'self compassion', involves taking care of your own needs, accepting your weaknesses and failures as well as your strengths, and staying in touch with your emotions. Because selflessness is such a prized virtue in many circles, many believe self-love is egoistical. But really? To me, caring for other people is important, but it shouldn’t come at the expense of your own 'well being'. Why? I'll explain you why :).
1. With 'self love' you can develop healthier habits
In my own experience, loving yourself can help you make better health decisions and you become more motivated to make positive changes in your life. To me 'self love' include eating healthier and daily exercising. And I must admit 'self compassion' sure helped me form new, healthier habits.
2. 'Self love' improves your relationships too
There’s a common saying that states you cannot truly love others until you love yourself. And this to me is very true! While this quip is a bit extreme, loving yourself does help improve your relationships with others. When you love yourself, you will not feel as dependent on other people for your sense of worth. This helps you set boundaries or, if necessary, end unhealthy relationships. People who love themselves also tend to understand themselves better, which helps them identify the kinds of relationships they want or they do not want anymore. Be wise here!
3. 'Self love' can increase happiness, yes.
Accepting and loving yourself is linked to higher satisfaction with life, and therefore, more happiness. When you are constantly analysing your flaws and criticising your choices, it is hard to feel happy about anything. And, in my opinion, 'self love' encourages you to think of yourself like a dear friend. You can acknowledge that you are not perfect, but still worthy of acceptance and support. At the end of the day, nobody is perfect, but we can try our best to be better and improve on all levels of our life.
4. 'Self love' boosts your confidence, without a doubt
It is very difficult to feel confident if you are constantly focused on criticising yourself. People with negative self-talk often struggle with low self-esteem. And a lack of confidence naturally follows. If you want to feel more confident, self-love is a good way to exercise that muscle. Recognise your worth and skills, be compassionate when you are frustrated with yourself, and you sure will notice your confidence building. You should daily practise that! It is well worth it.
5. 'Self love' will help you achieve your goals
Self-love teaches that your dreams deserve priority. It is not selfish to go after what you want in life. People may try to tell you otherwise, but as long as you are not trampling on others to reach your goals, you should live life in the way that fulfils you. Self-love also provides the tools you need to achieve your dreams, such as reduced stress, emotional resilience, increased productivity, and confidence.
6. 'Self love' helps reduce stress
Self-care is a significant part of self-love, remember this!! When you love yourself, you recognise signs of burnout and can take steps to reduce your stress. Without self-love, you might not believe you deserve a break. The thought of doing something 'just for me' might be very challenging to accept. You are therefore more likely to power through a stressful time even when it hurts. People with healthy self-love are more willing to take time to care for themselves when they are stressed.
7. 'Self love' will improve your emotional resilience
During hard times, it is easy to slip into despair. Depending on the environment you are in, you might be dealing with people who blame you for your hardships. You might blame yourself. Self-love helps counter negative, critical self-talk and put things in perspective. Even if your struggles are a result of a mistake you made, self-love encourages you to learn from the mistake and move forward. This builds your emotional resilience and prepares you for future challenges.
8. Become more productive
I learned one thing for sure and that is - procrastination is a productivity killer!! To get yourself motivated, you might resort to harsh tactics. Some people use threats of 'self punishment' to try and get going on a task, but that is not an effective motivator!! It is better to have compassion for yourself when you procrastinate. Use your 'failure' as a learning opportunity for the future. Instead of being bogged down with 'self criticism', you will feel lighter and ready to make changes to your behavior.
I hardly believe that the concept of self-love can be very challenging. You might be working through the belief that says self-love equals selfishness. The benefits of self-love I have given thus far may not be quite convincing enough. However, consider this - loving yourself helps other people too. Like happiness, self-love can be contagious. :)
If you model what a healthy relationship with self looks like, it sure will shine and be passed to others too. Share the love and show people around that self care and self compassion are crucial for living a healthy and happy life. World need more of this!!
Until next time, with love, S.
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