A woman's sensual expression is often shamed, judged, criticised and told it's wrong. But why?
To me, sensuality is
- Something intangible, though hit by stones.
- It is natural, though been severely programmed with shame.
- It is curious and mysterious, though ridden with imposed guilt.
- It is harmonic with our very nature, though indoctrinated with negativity.
- It is the purest essence, though called lewd.
- It is feeling and pleasure, though bashed in connotation with crudeness and salacious.
Now pause and think.
1. Connect to your sensuality
Without being in tune with your sensuality, your body, your feelings and emotions, you are not trusting your intuition, therefore not feeling safe in your body which leads to feeling wrong for your own expression - and that, to me, is all wrong!! Why? Because our self expression is the most liberating feeling and our creativity is directly linked (attached if you wish) to it. And without it, we not just block ourself from the way we feel authentically, but we also block our sexuality, that ability we should have to create what we desire.
Sensuality (n.) pronunciation: /ˌsen(t)SHəˈwalədē/
1. The enjoyment, expression, or pursuit of pleasure.
1.1 The condition of being pleasing or fulfilling to the senses.2. Stop shaming sensuality
Sensuality has been shamed, crucified, defamed, suppressed and repressed. It has been shackled with a tight clasp of psychological enslavement barred with a societal embodiment of guilt and abashment. Yes, sensuality has been blatantly associated with lewdness, lust, sex, irreligious and immoral behavior. It has been called and labeled many derogatory descriptors with massive attempt through societal contempt and suppression. Sensuality has been pushed down, suffocated and inebriated with imposed shame. It has been pervaded and bashed, though in truth it is greatly feared. But despite that, sensuality is the key liberator from perceived mundane into perceived wonder. To me, it is filled with mysticism, wonder and miracles. It is gentle yet strong, vulnerable yet unbreakable. Try to remember that.
3. In order to become alive you have to become sensually aware
To become sensually immersed in the pure presence and experience of a moment is to dance with the omniscient, the wordless. To come alive is to be sensual. To be sensual is to become aware. You do not need to wait for your next planned vacation, you can always choose deep sensuality right now, right here. All you need is to get some time alone, free some space, light up candles, whatever gives you that feeling of deep relaxation and start. But first, do not be ashamed of it, let your sensual expressions speak for you.
Here are few tips that help me do just that,
- Feel into the moment
Become aware of your surroundings. Notice the colors and objects in the room. Bring awareness to your senses. Any aroma you notice? Is there a song playing? What sounds do you hear in the background? What do the textures of the clothes you are wearing feel like? What colors do you see around you? Anything you feel, feel it.
- Breathe the moment in
If feeling into the moment seems too much all at once, you can start with simply bringing awareness to your breath and see what arises to your senses. To help get out of your mind-chatter, you can say to yourself, “I am breathing in. I am breathing out.” As you repeatedly say this in sync with your breathing, begin to notice what your senses want to share.
- Do not be ashamed of applying your imagination
As you begin to notice and become aware of your senses, play with the energies and use your imagination to amplify what feels good. If you walk by a pastry shop and smell an aroma of freshly baked cake, imagine the cake is for a big party just to celebrate you! And yes, our minds can worry and take us in all sorts of directions, but through our senses we can help trigger remembrance of our innate abilities to become playful and joyful with our imagination rather than fearful and anxious. Ok?
- Do not rush, simply take your time
In a world telling us to rush rush rush, it is time to simply slow down. Be present with yourself as much as you can throughout your day. If you walk to work, can you use perception to notice what is different about your walk each day? If you drive to work, wake up a few minutes earlier and take a different route from the normal one. What do you see that you have not seen before?
My advise to you, set 10 minutes aside each day just for you, to enjoy something you love with the intention of full presence and honouring your own sensual pleasure.
- Appoint for your next sensuality reminder
It can be difficult to remember to be mindful and sensually perceptive in the moment with the pace of life (i sure know that). Set a sensuality reminder for yourself! Setting a daily reminder on your phone such as: 'notice something bright in the room' or 'feel into what my body is telling me right now.' This will help trigger you back into the moment. Get creative with the reminders! Remember, you can also give meaning to an accessory or object you see daily such as a bracelet that triggers you to be alert to the sensuality of the moment (to me, are the rings I wear).
4. Build your own bridge to wonders
Sensuality is the bridge to wonder and sacred mystery in our lives. As your perceptional reality becomes more alive and heightened, you will begin to perceive freshness and new discoveries never noticed in your world before. It is important to focus on the deep savour of sensuality and authentic expression, the lushness of your own joy and pleasure await you.
Just let yourself claim back our greatest passions and pleasures in our lives and never hide or shame what makes your hearts sing. If ever, now it is time to celebrate and express your deepest joy in life, not to fear it.
You are creator of your own life. Embrace it. You sure will become a better version of yourself.
Until next time, S.
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