When was the last time, you had a conversation with yourself?
Time you could hear your voice, to closely examine what values in your current life?
To accept and let go? 'letting go of things that no longer serve me or you'.? Shhhhh, listen...
When we find things that we want in life, we sometimes hold on so tightly for fear that we will lose it. At times, our minds can make us believe we need these belongings, situations, and relationships, and out of this fear we hold on to them for dear life. But today, I’m here to tell you, that clinging on to anything is (to me) just simply not attractive. Much like when you have those pesky dryer sheets clinging to your freshly laundered clothes, when you cling (and cling for dear life) you are energetically sending an unattractive message to the Universe. Just think for a bit, when we hold on to these things that we think we need, we let go of the trust and faith that we are always supported. Beside it is natural for things to come in and out of our lives, and the lesson is to trust when it’s time to let some things go. And let me tell you, this for sure has been one of the hardest lessons for me, and one that I am still struggling with now. Still learning, every day. And I know what I must do and have been mentally preparing myself to let go, beside, just with that intention, I feel so much lighter and freer already. Things are here, waiting for me to welcome them. Into my life. And so should you!
But first, ask yourself?
Are there things in your life that you find yourself too emotionally attached to? Are these things getting in the way of your own personal growth? And if you answered yes, then follow to thoughts below.
1. Cultivate your intuition and awareness
Yes, awareness about your life as it is right now. By going inward, meditating, and nurturing that deep knowingness, we can find the aspects of our lives that are no longer serving us. Just like me, maybe you have something that you know you need to let go of. The first step in letting go is acknowledging that which no longer serves you.
2. Adopt the attitude of acceptance
To me, this one is a game changer. And once you have acknowledged that it is time for you to let go, your mind might begin to flood your thoughts with reasons of why you shouldn’t. Nostalgia, possibility, opportunity. Remember to accept that you know letting go is the right thing for you to do.
3. Honour the part of your life that you are letting go
It can be sad to release large parts of our lives. I know that, trust me (it hurts sometimes, but at the same time it gives you additional space to grow, to grow as a human being). There is nothing wrong with feeling this sadness. To help cope with this, take some time to honour the places these aspects of your life have held. Find something that resonates with you, where you can hold space for this and find closure for it.
4. Trust that great things are coming to fill the void
Maybe the hardest part of letting go is trusting that there is more to come. Patience is key in this part of life. Whenever we put in the work to let go of what’s not serving us, the Universe will conspire to bring in something even more wonderful. It might sound 'hokey' or hard to believe, but have the faith that this is possible. Yes, and it is!
5. It is totally ok to have the urge to change things
- It is ok to let things go.
- It is ok to admit that something used to work, and now it doesn’t.
- It is ok to change and yes
- It is okay to require a change
6. Think of your life's many phases
Think back on your life in terms of major stages. Most of us live at least four lives (phases) in a lifetime. It is our childhood, adolescence/early adulthood, then comes that 'settled' adulthood and of course aging with the death in the end. It is a lifecycle. However, there are many points of change, and each of these can lead you into a new life. So think again, what are your points of change? How have they led you to a new distinct life? Think about the big theme or lesson from each of your separate lives. Do you understand it? Have you let it change you? Are you conscious of the lesson? Write it down. Look it over. Think about it. Let it sink into you. Now let it go.
7. Pay attention to your duties and desires
Compare those two. Start looking at every activity in your life and asking yourself if you do it from one or another. If you do nothing else on this list, do this. It sure is and 'eye opening'. Then ask yourself what is the role of duty in your life. Even more, what’s so great about this duty? Do you have a clear answer? Does duty serve you? Does duty flow from love? Does it bring creativity and love? (Um, no.) And then, how do you feel about desire? Do you feel like it should take a second place in your life? Are you a duty first, then desire if there’s any time leftover person? Why? What has that gotten you? Do you need to be that kind of person? What are your other options? All these question, ask yourself. Pause. Think. Search for the answers.
8. What is success to you?
Success at something you don’t love is not success. Remember this! And to me, is a failure wearing a different outfit. It is a failure that doesn’t serve you. Even failure at something you love is success. Failure at something you love is you, learning how to get better at this thing you love. It’s 'skill enhancing', it’s 'insight producing', it’s 'consistency creating' (my favourite of course), it’s teaching and learning and lifting you to the next level. It’s growing you in a direction you love.
9. Pay attention to enjoyment and values
So, as simple as it can be let's say
- I enjoy eating a bag of potato chips, ok, but I don’t value it.
- I value having a relationship with my kids but I don’t always enjoy playing 'legos' with them.
Ok, do you get it?!
What keeps you from enjoying the things you truly value? Ask yourself that question and plunge in deep for the answers and you will find some interesting stuff. You’ll probably find a cache of outdated beliefs and fears and defenses that you aren’t even aware of.
And advise I can give you is to become aware of them and do the work of rooting them out, naming them, and then 'setting them on fire and watching them burn'
The point is, if you do the finding and rooting out process, you’ll open yourself up to a lot more enjoyment of what you value. But yes, you can also do a reverse and ask why you do enjoy the things you don’t value. Another interesting set of questions and answers, right? Become thinker and do.
To many of us, this may be just seeking the comfort that comes from the habits of familiarity. Understand that this is nothing wrong with that, but once you understand your motives, you can decide if there’s a better way to get that comfort you want.
Do whatever, just don't die not doing things that valued your life.
You only have one life to live. Get rid of 'what if's' and let go of things that no longer serve you.
New opportunities are there for you to welcome them.
Appreciate life.
Be open.
Until next time, S.
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